Adam's Rib

The view from a ferry in just off the Seattle coast last August. Snapped with my iPod.

You'll have to help me understand:

You, who left her here in this weary
little body, blood and bones,
Betrayed, abused, sinful WOMAN
created from this godlike rib--
"I don't want to be free," she whispers,
"I have too much baggage for this journey--"
so much shit on these tiny shoulders,
these little legs and arms can't lift
her face to heaven for fear
of condemnation. "Sometimes
I wish never knew You," she whispers,
ashamed, watering the linoleum
with salty tears. YOU blessed her
with intelligence and a thirst for Solomonic
wisdom, but this little brain can't comprehend

the Love You proved on that bloody wood,
pouring down in gallon bucketfuls
before I was born and always.
God, this Love is something.

Image and poem © 2011 Christa Hillmer. Please contact me (chillmer06@hotmail.com) to use my work.

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Slouching Towards Samaria

When Jesus spoke to the Samaritan woman at the well, as recorded in John 4:1-41, he was speaking to someone who was an outcast. She'd been loved...or used...by six different men. Six! Do you think she wanted to go from man to man, searching for...love? acceptance?

What are you searching for?

In today's culture, this woman is not such an outcast. Her life is the norm! So many women and men go from relationship to relationship, searching for something and not finding it...What are you searching for?

If you're searching, you already know there's something missing...

So, what are you waiting for? Jesus said: "'If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.'" (John 4:10, emphasis added)

Read the rest of this woman's story here.

I wrote another post almost a year ago about a very similar topic: Consequently Christa: Psalm 27:4

Image: Sieger Koder via Pilgrim's Progress blog

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Isaiah 22

"I will place on his shoulder the key to the house of David; what he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open. I will drive him like a peg into a firm place; he will become a seat of honor for the house of his father. All the glory of his family will hang on him: its offspring and offshoots—all its lesser vessels, from the bowls to all the jars." ~ Isaiah 22:22-24

This is something deep. I'm digesting it. What implications does this have for today?

Image by Myron Malone via TexasEscapes.com.

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Daily Image: Eeyore's Brothers

This just made my day! :)
Image via Rasmus Auctioneers.

Lentventure: Careless Life

If I were to rename this week's study, it would be "Loneliness." Loneliness is something I relate to...it's something I feel on a regular basis. In the story, the little girl is ostracized by her friends because of her mother's HIV/AIDS, causing the child to feel uncared for and lonely. It is the people in the community around her who are careless, not the girl. They are careless of her need for companionship. I wonder if all the careless people in the story knew they were being careless. Many probably did...

Is there anyone in my life or my community with needs that I am careless of?

What about you? Who can you reach out to this week?

"My commandment is this: Love each other as I have loved you." ~John 15:12

Images via USMM.org and Threecee.

Lentventure: Helpless Recap

It snowed here last week. It wasn't that cold--30s--and it was the prettiest snow ever, the kind you catch on your tongue and snap photos of on way to work!

Apparently I'm a terrible blogger. I knew posting daily during lent would be tough since I normally post no more than once per week. Call me a failure if you want, but while I wasn't blogging I spent most of Helpless week feeling rather helpless. With the semester ending soon, I've been struggling with midterms, research papers and all sorts of projects coming due. I was seriously stressed out, which is probably evident in a few of my recent non-lent posts. I mentally "shut down" because l felt so overwhelmed with my obligations--school, work or life in general. I found myself looking up Bible verses with specific phrases that I knew would comfort me and give me the determination and inspiration I needed to continue.

I found myself wondering how to pray about my homework...and the Lord's Prayer was surprisingly comforting. I don't think I've ever "gotten" these verses before.

"Our Father in heaven, / may your name be kept holy. / May your Kingdom come soon. / May your will be done on earth, / as it is in heaven. / Give us today the food we need, / and forgive us our sins, / as we have forgiven those who sin against us. / And don’t let us yield to temptation, / but rescue us from the evil one." ~Matthew 6:9-13

I also drank a lot of coffee. Mmmmm...coffee. I really liked the idea of giving up driving to simulate helplessness. Depending on public transportation would actually be really tough here in Omaha because our busing system not very good. I'm not able to do this now because my work and school schedules depend on me being able to get across the city in less than 45 minutes, but this is something I would like to do in the summer perhaps.

How did you experience helplessness last week?

Lookout for a Careless post before the end of this week!

Photo: mine

Lent brings challenges

Dear readers, I'm sorry I've been so neglectful of you these last few days. I've been working night and day (quite literally) to finish up this research paper. I'm so stressed out about the whole thing and so embarrassed that I'm still not finished--it was due last Friday--and just feeling all together discouraged, wishing I'd chosen another topic...I guess you could say I feel a little helpless.

If you think of me, maybe you could pray this passage from Psalms on my behalf:

"Lord, sustain me as you promised, that I may live! Do not let my hope be crushed. Sustain me, and I will be rescued; then I will meditate continually on your decrees." ~Psalms 119:116-117

Thanks, and have a lovely, beautiful second day of spring!

Images via Madelinetosh and Seems Artless.

Judge me

Ever have a day when you can't shake those feelings of exhaustion, discouragement, anger, loneliness, sadness, frustration, {fill in the blank}? Those days are the worst. Today I tried to stuff my discouragement/frustration/loneliness with food/entertainment/hateful thoughts...it didn't work.

Image via Scott Roberts.

Lentventure: Don't Worry, Be Joyful

Today the burden of midterms finally settled on my shoulders. So, I spent most of the day feeling pretty discouraged. After my last class, I sat down and wrote out a list of the projects I have due this week and all the steps I need to take to complete those projects. I assigned a day (Tuesday through Friday) to each step. When I had finally finished writing everything out--this took about 30 minutes--I realized that I can totally get all this stuff done, providing I follow the list and don't slack off at all. I literally felt my mind clear and relax a little. Praise God for to-do lists!

Today's Lentventure:

• What worries do you have about your current life circumstances? This week (and the next three weeks) is midterms, so I've got a lot on my plate. Plus, I'm working three part-time jobs.
  


• How has God provided in the past? How is he currently meeting your needs? In the past, I've completed my work on time, often when I've put it off until the last minute. I guess God (and my professors) have been pretty merciful so far. Now that I have a to-do list, I feel less overwhelmed and more able to complete the tasks before me. I will continue to pray for the clarity of mind I need to complete my assignments. I just have to keep reminding myself that my grades and classes are less important than my relationship with God. Hmmm...maybe I should read my Bible before going back to my studying. :)

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." ~Philippians 4:6-7

"Do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." ~ Matthew 6:31, 33 (View the rest of this passage here. It's really good!)

View this week's study by Manie Sodoma, on behalf of World Vision ACT:S Lent 2011!
Go to Lent 2011 to sign up for study on the World Vision ACT:S website. You can choose whether you want to receive daily or weekly e-mail reminders about topics and such. Happy Lent-ing!

[Photo complements of PWOND.com and NaitoOfNarnia.]

Lentventure: Server Down, Diavolo

My Internet connection took a sick day. Two actually. (Thanks to my readers for your patience and kind regards!) So I spent 12 hours over Saturday and Sunday at a Diavolo choreography workshop. Diavolo is a dance company based in Los Angeles, California that specializes in very athletic, acrobatic movement performed on pieces of architecture. (Think Cirque du Soleil meets a merry go 'round.)

My goals for the workshop were to be challenged physically and be vulnerable emotionally. God totally answered my prayers. The workshop was challenging, but not so challenging that I felt out of place--such an answer to prayer! (I have only been dancing for a few years, so my level of technique is not as high as most dancers in my age bracket.) I was also able to build closer relationships with some other Omaha dancers! I expected to be one of the more inexperienced dancers at the workshop, as I am accustomed to being at rehearsals with The Moving Company. But I wasn't, enabling me to encourage others without feeling totally incompetent. In fact, the athletic, pedestrian movement really felt natural in my body! Where in Omaha can I take hip-hop and/or gymnastic classes?

I finally found a moment between classes today to check my missed e-mails and Facebook messages and of course catch up on Lent. I will pick up where I left off, in a very abbreviated fashion.

Lentventure: this week's theme is worthlessness:

• Choose a place to record your Lentventure: done :)
• Make a list of anything that might create tension during Lent: the demands of my professional obligations, including school and work responsibilities
  
• Choose something physical to give up this week: I will give up watching television, including the online kind.
• Define the word worth: Worth means "having value," so I guess feeling worthless might mean a person has no value or purpose; hypothetically, I might be a waste of time or education or employment. I might be unlovable or even just broke.

Have you ever felt worthless? I have. I think I'll write about it tomorrow.

"Listen to me, you islands; / hear this, you distant nations: / Before I was born the LORD called me; / from my mother’s womb he has spoken my name." ~ Isaiah 49:1 (Check out the rest of the passage here. It's really good!)

View this week's study by Manie Sodoma, on behalf of World Vision ACT:S Lent 2011!
Go to Lent 2011 to sign up for study on the World Vision ACT:S website. You can choose whether you want to receive daily or weekly e-mail reminders about topics and such. Happy Lent-ing!

[Diavolo photo from CultureVulture.net, who I'm guessing stole it from somewhere else...]